I have tried to find my prostate myself but cannot identify it. How far inside is the prostate, and is self-milking safe?
Quick Answer: How Far Inside Is the Prostate?
The prostate lies below the bladder and directly in front of the rectum, but there is no medically recommended insertion depth or self-milking technique.
- The prostate can be felt through the rectal wall during a properly performed medical examination.
- Its exact position and how easily it can be felt vary with body anatomy, prostate size and examination technique.
- Do not keep inserting farther or use longer objects simply because you cannot identify the prostate.
- Self-prostate milking has not been established as necessary for prostate health or as a treatment for BPH.
- Pain, bleeding, fever, chills or significant urinary symptoms are reasons to stop manipulation and seek appropriate medical advice.
Where Is the Prostate Located?
The prostate is part of the male reproductive system.
Anatomically, it sits:
- below the urinary bladder;
- in front of the rectum;
- around the first part of the urethra;
- and above the muscles of the pelvic floor.
This location is why a healthcare professional can assess part of the prostate through the rectal wall during a digital rectal examination (DRE).
It lies on the other side of the rectal wall. A clinician is feeling the posterior surface of the gland through that wall during examination.
Why I Would Not Give a Fixed Insertion Depth
The old version of this page gave a precise distance and told readers to continue searching at that depth.
I would no longer recommend that.
The apparent position of the prostate varies according to:
- individual pelvic anatomy;
- body position;
- prostate size;
- rectal anatomy;
- pelvic-floor muscle tone;
- and whether pain, swelling or another condition is present.
A fixed measurement therefore should not be treated as a target for inserting a finger or device.
Going Farther Is Not the Solution
If you cannot identify the prostate, do not respond by inserting farther, increasing pressure or using a longer object. Doing so can injure rectal or pelvic tissues without providing a medical benefit.
What If You Cannot Find Your Prostate?
Not being able to identify the prostate yourself does not mean anything is wrong with the gland.
Even trained clinicians assess the prostate as part of a structured examination rather than by relying only on a patient’s perception of where the gland should be.
More importantly, there is generally no medical reason for you to locate your own prostate in order to “drain” or routinely massage it.
If your concern is:
- weak urine flow;
- frequent urination;
- pelvic pain;
- pain with ejaculation;
- difficulty emptying the bladder;
- or suspected prostate enlargement;
those symptoms deserve an appropriate medical assessment rather than repeated self-examination.
Does the Prostate Need to Be Milked?
No evidence shows that a healthy prostate requires routine manual drainage.
The prostate naturally contributes fluid to semen. That normal function does not mean secretions must periodically be squeezed out manually.
There is also no good evidence that routine self-milking:
- prevents prostate disease;
- shrinks an enlarged prostate;
- prevents prostate cancer;
- cures prostatitis;
- improves urine flow caused by BPH;
- or is necessary for general male health.
See our broader evidence review: Prostate Milking: Benefits, Risks & Evidence .
Does Prostate Milking Help an Enlarged Prostate?
Routine prostate milking is not an established treatment for benign prostatic hyperplasia (BPH) .
BPH involves noncancerous growth of prostate tissue around the urethral outlet.
Evidence-based treatment can include:
- watchful waiting and lifestyle measures;
- BPH medications ;
- minimally invasive procedures;
- and surgery when appropriate.
Manual pressure on the prostate does not remove the tissue responsible for BPH obstruction.
What About Prostate Massage for Prostatitis?
The word prostatitis includes several different conditions.
They should not all be treated in the same way.
Acute Bacterial Prostatitis
Acute bacterial prostatitis can cause:
- fever;
- chills;
- painful or difficult urination;
- pelvic or perineal pain;
- urinary retention;
- and feeling seriously unwell.
Do Not Massage the Prostate in Acute Bacterial Prostatitis
Current European Association of Urology guidance gives a strong recommendation against prostatic massage in acute bacterial prostatitis.
Prostate manipulation in this situation can push bacteria into the bloodstream and potentially contribute to serious infection.
Chronic Pelvic Pain
Chronic prostatitis/chronic pelvic pain syndrome is more complicated. Pain may involve the prostate, pelvic-floor muscles, nerves and other pain-processing mechanisms.
Modern management is therefore usually multimodal rather than based on repeatedly trying to empty the prostate.
What If Prostate Stimulation Causes Pain?
Pain is a reason to stop rather than increase pressure.
Possible sources of pain include:
- rectal irritation;
- anal fissures;
- hemorrhoids;
- pelvic-floor muscle spasm;
- prostatitis;
- chronic pelvic pain syndrome;
- or tissue injury.
Sharp, burning, increasing or persistent pain should not be interpreted as evidence that the prostate needs stronger massage.
What If You Notice Bleeding?
Rectal bleeding after manipulation may come from irritation, hemorrhoids, an anal fissure or injury.
Blood in urine or semen can also have several possible causes and should not automatically be attributed to “clearing” the prostate.
Stop further manipulation if bleeding occurs.
Significant, persistent or recurrent bleeding deserves medical evaluation.
Could the Pelvic Floor Be the Real Problem?
Yes, particularly in men with chronic pelvic pain.
Current EAU chronic pelvic pain guidance recognizes pelvic-floor overactivity and myofascial trigger points as possible contributors to chronic pelvic pain.
Assessment and treatment may involve a physiotherapist trained in male pelvic-floor disorders.
Depending on the individual findings, therapy may focus on:
- pelvic-floor relaxation;
- myofascial treatment;
- stretching of shortened muscles;
- biofeedback;
- and addressing the wider chronic-pain problem.
Pelvic-Floor Therapy Is Not the Same as Prostate Milking
A trained pelvic-health professional assesses which muscles and structures are contributing to symptoms and chooses treatment accordingly. The aim is not simply to press on or drain the prostate.
How Does a Doctor Examine the Prostate?
When medically appropriate, a clinician may perform a digital rectal examination (DRE).
The examination allows the clinician to assess features such as:
- approximate prostate size;
- symmetry;
- consistency;
- tenderness;
- and whether an obvious abnormality is present.
A DRE alone cannot diagnose every prostate condition.
Depending on symptoms, evaluation may also include:
- urinalysis;
- PSA testing when appropriate;
- post-void residual measurement;
- urine-flow testing;
- imaging;
- or other prostate and urinary tests .
Do Not Use Longer Objects to Search for the Prostate
The previous version of this article recommended using longer devices when a finger could not reach what the reader thought was the prostate.
I do not recommend that approach. Increasing insertion depth or using unfamiliar objects can increase the risk of rectal trauma, pain, bleeding or retained foreign objects without providing an established prostate-health benefit.
When Should You Seek Medical Care?
Seek prompt medical assessment if prostate or pelvic symptoms include:
- fever or chills;
- complete inability to urinate;
- severe or worsening pelvic pain;
- significant rectal bleeding;
- visible blood in the urine;
- persistent unexplained blood in semen;
- or feeling seriously unwell.
Do not continue prostate manipulation while acute infection or tissue injury is possible.
Dr. Albana’s Answer
Hello,
The prostate lies below the bladder and directly in front of the rectum, which is why part of it can be felt through the rectal wall during a medical examination.
However, I would not advise you to use a fixed number of centimeters as a target or to keep going farther when you cannot find the gland. Individual anatomy varies, and there is no medically recommended depth for routine self-prostate milking.
I would also correct an important statement from the older answer: prostate milking is not something every man needs for general health. There is no good evidence that regularly draining the prostate prevents disease, shrinks BPH or cures chronic prostate problems.
I would particularly avoid self-massage if you have fever, chills, painful urination or significant pelvic pain because acute bacterial prostatitis is one situation in which prostate massage should not be performed.
If you are trying to locate your prostate because you have urinary or pelvic symptoms, I would recommend having those symptoms evaluated properly rather than repeatedly trying to examine the gland yourself.
— Dr. Albana Greca, MD, MMedSc, Family Physician / General Practitioner
Most Asked Questions About Finding the Prostate
How far inside is the prostate?
The prostate lies directly in front of the rectum and can be assessed through the rectal wall during a medical examination. Its exact position varies, so I do not recommend using a fixed insertion depth as a guide for self-milking.
Why can’t I find my prostate?
Individual anatomy, prostate size, body position and pelvic-floor muscle tone can all affect what you perceive. Not being able to identify the prostate yourself does not indicate a prostate abnormality.
Should I go farther if I cannot feel the prostate?
No. Do not keep increasing insertion depth or pressure simply because you cannot identify the gland.
Does a larger prostate make it easier to feel?
Prostate enlargement may alter its size and contour, but self-examination cannot reliably determine whether you have BPH or how large the prostate is.
Does the prostate need regular milking?
No. There is no established medical requirement for healthy men to manually drain the prostate.
Can prostate milking treat BPH?
No reliable evidence shows that prostate milking shrinks BPH or removes bladder-outlet obstruction caused by enlarged prostate tissue.
Can prostate massage be dangerous with prostatitis?
Yes. Current EAU guidance specifically recommends against prostate massage in acute bacterial prostatitis because manipulation can spread bacteria into the bloodstream.
What should I do if prostate stimulation hurts?
Stop. Significant pain is not something to push through. Persistent pain, fever, urinary difficulty or bleeding should be medically evaluated.
Related Prostate Massage & Milking Guides
Medical References
-
European Association of Urology.
EAU Guidelines on Urological Infections.
2026.
EAU Urological Infections Guideline -
European Association of Urology.
EAU Guidelines on Chronic Pelvic Pain — Management.
2026.
EAU Chronic Pelvic Pain Guideline -
Lai HH, Pontari MA, Argoff CE, et al.
Male Chronic Pelvic Pain: AUA Guideline Part II — Treatment of
Chronic Prostatitis/Chronic Pelvic Pain Syndrome.
J Urol. 2025;214(2):127-137.
PubMed -
National Institute of Diabetes and Digestive and Kidney Diseases.
Prostatitis: Inflammation of the Prostate.
NIDDK -
Cleveland Clinic.
Prostate: Anatomy, Location, Function & Conditions.
Medically reviewed; updated November 2025.
Cleveland Clinic
Medical information notice: This page provides general health education and is not an instructional guide for internal prostate manipulation. Persistent urinary symptoms, pelvic pain, bleeding or suspected prostatitis should be evaluated by an appropriate healthcare professional.
Written & medically reviewed by Dr. Albana Greca, MD, MMedSc • Family Physician / General Practitioner • Last medically reviewed: August 2026